Zimbabwe desperately needed a hero

Zimbabwe desperately needed a hero

Good news vana vevhu (a Zimbabwean phrase which means: children of the soil.. though at times it feels more like children of great toil), finally the cries of a nation with 16 official languages, have now been heard. Everybody knows that Zimbabwe desperately needed a hero! Everybody also knows that the Avengers gang mostly concentrate their “world-saving” efforts within New York State and fictional African locations like Wakanda. This means the rest of planet earth needs its own heroes. Kids in Uzumbamarambapfungwe district also need a hero, the same goes for the people hanging around Sossusvlei Dunes or the thick jungles of Congo. Why isn’t there a team of heroes patrolling Sossusvlei to ensure everybody’s safety? One’s Jeep might breakdown there, though unlikely, given that its a Jeep… but still it’s possible.

What? You’re still stuck counting your fingers in disbelieve, over those 16 official Zimbabwean languages I mentioned above. Sigh, ok let me put you out of your misery by listing them in alphabetical order. Which now means for the first time in Zimbabwean history, Shona doesn’t get to come first. I am going to completely ignore all those people at the back, that are holding up placards written, “It’s academically referred to as Chishona”. The official languages are (sorry Shyriiwook I said official) Chewa, Chibarwe, English, Kalanga, Koisan, Nambya, Ndau, Ndebele, Shangani, Shona, sign language, Sotho, Tonga, Tswana, Venda, and finally Xhosa. Now that that’s out of the way, let’s watch the short film below as Zimbabwe’s very own mwana vevhu; Captain Mfombi, attempts to break the nation’s never-ending chain of misfortunes. One Hararian crime at a time! Next stop Uzumbamarambapfungwe!

Imagine Everything with Probeatz brings you: Captain Mfombi

Well, that was not your usual “hero” was it? Captain Mfombi has morals as dodgy as Harare City Council’s public water supply. His laser-beam-eyes leave you with, and I quote “Internal injuries” that can not be proven in court. Well, you and I know a few government agencies that could be calling him up soon, for some commission work. This hero has got it all, he can even fly! On a sidenote that damsel-in-distress had such gorgeous hair texture, does she make YouTube tutorials or something?

Enough about that, I just love hair. I shall now leave you here, wondering how Captain Mfombi got flight permission from the Civil Aviation Authority of Zimbabwe. When Daniel Chingoma’s African made helicopter never got allowed to take flight! Now, look at it! Sigh, imagine the adventures Professor Chingoma could have had in there. It was all wasted away.

Thank you TECHZim for the photograph of Daniel Chingoma’s abandoned helicopter

I guess all this makes Daniel Chingoma the original hero that Zimbabwean desperately needed patrolling in its skies! As Zimbabweans in other countries and within Zimbabwe continue to suffer from different things like corruption, xenophobia, record-breaking economic hardships, an inability to get the paperwork one needs to fly his helicopter, or COVID-pandemic related sufferings. I hope the heroes Zimbabwe needs, never stop taking to the skies!

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